Monday, May 9, 2016

Tick Tock



Tick Tock
I hear my
Biological clock
Ticking away
The eggs I have
In short supply.

“Yuh nuh have
A child, yet?”
He looks at me
Like fertile soil
In which to
Plant his seed.

I look at him
As though he is
Trying to plant
A weed in my
Well tended garden.

“Step along,
Young boy,”
“Don't you have
Two, Five, Eight
Kids, brother man?”
“Ew,” are thoughts
That prod the back
Of my tongue, begging
To spring board off
The tip and dive
Into their ear
To swim in the
Gray matter
They call a brain.

And still the clock
Ticks....
Tick Tock
Tick Tock.

Fuck the clock.
Toss it into one
Of those trash disposals,
Let it be reduced
To bits and pieces,
Freeing me of
This prison.

This prison of
Others' expectations
Due to the fact
That I am a woman,
And as such, I must
Breed!
Breed?
Breed?!?

Alas, my entire
Existence, in a
Blink of an eye,
Has been reduced to
A walking womb.

I want to....
Breathe, the inhale,
Exhale kind,
Don't get it twisted.

Then again, I could just
Let time slip away,
Let the clock run out,
Ignore the pity
In people's eyes,
The venom in the
Eyes of overtaxed
Parents, the laments
Of family and strangers
For not letting my genes
Live beyond my body.

Extracting this clock
From my craw and
Breathe. Inhale. Exhale.
Breathe.

Then...
Then I would see a little one,
Be it a floppy headed babe
Or a gangly seven year old
Who has just begun to reason,
And....

And I touch my hand
To my stomach.

And I imagine a
Little me with an
Extra bit of spice.

And...
And I think,
Just maybe,
Just maybe
I could be
Someone's mommy.

Tick Tock
Tick Tock
Tick

Tock.

image credit: Ales Krivec

1 comment:

rallentanda said...

Thought provoking poem. Motherhood is an expectation for women.It is part of the herd mentality to ensure the ongoing of the species.It is also a huge responsibility and a long term commitment. I have been a mother for almost my entire adult life so I do not know what it is like not to be one. However I do have friends who are not and not only are they happy completed people but they are also pleased they did not make the decision to have children.

 
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