Monday, December 17, 2012

I Love Men

Jackson said
He loves women.

This statement was not
Meant to underscore
His sexual preference
Or send gay men
Fluttering to their next
Man of interest.

The statement was more
Of a declaration,
Albeit a subtle one.

Its subtlety was to
Soften the edges of
The truth that
He could not,
Would not
Commit himself to
One woman.

To Jackson,
My silence was a
Quiet acceptance
Of what he was
Proposing and the
Type of man
He chose to be.

The truth was
I had accepted
His choice as
It was my choice
As well.
I love men.

I did not make
A statement of my choice,
What was good
For the goose was
Good for the gander.

For Jackson,
He could not handle
My side of this
Secret arrangement.

He developed
An unfortunate case
Of a broken heart
When he found me
In the arms of Pierre.

We did break up,
His idea, not mine,
But for the life of me
I could not figure out
Why it was okay
For him to love women
And not okay for
Me to love men.

As I packed
The last of my things,
I took a good look
At Jackson.
His face was a mask
Of pain and sadness.

His stance spoke
Of his vulnerability
And the open wound
That I had caused.

I should have walked
Out of the door and
Walked out of his life,
Instead I reached for
His hand and pulled
Jackson close.

I looked into his eyes,
Searching for a reason
To stay and asked him
If he wanted me to stay.

He said yes,
So I stayed, but only
Until I found him
In Monique's arms.

Submitted to imaginary garden with real toads and dVerse Poets


Brian Miller said...

its a dangerous game of hearts....esp when one does not want to commit....i think the big thing for me in this is having different standards for each other....which is just wrong for me...and i would not last in that...

jasmine calyx said...

This is awesome---gripping from the first word to the last. I suppose the difference was in perception and what part of your reality was verbally stated. He came out with it from the beginning, and you did not. Yeah, definitely a dangerous game to play. The hippie life would be fun if it weren't for those silly hearts getting in the way. ;)

Laura said...

I cannot imagine such an arrangement for myself... but I know that this is more common than most people think. Beautifully written.

Buddah Moskowitz said...

Great, compelling write. Didn't see that coming in the end, but isn't that always the way? When she was the other woman, I was ok with that, but when she made me the other man, it tore me to shreds. Hypocrisy *is* the greatest luxury, indeed.

Happy Christmas to one of the best writers I know (whose words I love), Moskowitz

Jenny Herner said...

What a wonderful story. I love this.

Audrey Howitt aka Divalounger said...

What a great write--great sense of the story--and compelling from beginning to end--

Karen said...

Jackson...Pierre...and I have good ole Frank! (staunch and steady, thank goodness!)

Mary said...

A powerful write here....showing that people sometimes expect different things of self and the other in a relationship. And when that happens, it just does NOT work! Point well made.

Lázaro Rojas said...

Sad ending.

Beachanny said...

I like this quite a lot; it is a modern poem about a modern woman or perhaps I should say a currently free woman who may choose "to love men"; a rarity in the world where many are chained by parents arranging marriages, parents selling girls into slavery, girls being kidnapped into slavery, religion oppressing young girls with so much fear and affecting countries' rules in a way that she could be stoned to death for choosing one not chosen for her not to mention more than one. This is a story of a brave, aware, Western woman in a time of change. Indeed it paints out loud all the subtleties of a relationship which in historic terms is radical.